Ponder Post: The Home-Maker

I was made aware of this 1924 novel, The Home-Maker written by Dorothy Canfield, because it was referenced by a blog I follow sporadically. The blog is Penelope Loves Lists, with the subtitle Unapologetically Organized, so I was expecting some humorous methods of tongue-in cheek home management from a long ago era. The story opens with a disciplined homemaker, Evangeline Knapp, working scrupulously to keep an immaculate home and three well-reared in children. My first impulse was to rebel against being bombarded with yet more "household tips" but the plot has a twist to it that enables exploration of stereotypical roles of husband and wife.

The reader is invited into the thoughts of Lester and Evangeline and is privy to revelations of feelings neither spouse can scarcely admit to him/her self, much less to society. Mrs. Knapp is not happy being home and yet riddled with guilt because she feels she should be. Mr. Knapp hates his job, does not advance in it, and feels to be a failure at providing for his family. I was pleasantly surprised by the sensitivity and character revelation in this 90+ year old bit of writing that recognized and reflected conflicted sentiments far ahead of their time.

In 1924, the same year the book was copyrighted, Dorothy Canfield wrote an article for the Los Angeles Examiner titled "Marital Relations". The article was printed in full at the beginning of my 1996 reprinted copy of the book. It was extremely forward thinking.

The novel is out of print and my library did not have it, so I bought it used on Amazon. There is a good summary on Amazon, but basically the plot is that due to a severe injury, the roles of Lester and Evangeline Knapp are reversed – the woman enters the work force and man steps in as the stay at home parent. The role expectancies are just as one would imagine for the 1920's time frame but this novel was amazingly both inciteful and insightful long before the feminism movement of the future. How the man and woman cope, and even thrive, in their interchanged roles makes for an engaging, thought-provoking, and poignant tale. It would make an excellent book club selection and discussion candidate.

For another review of this book check out the blog post that introduced me to it.
http://penelopeloveslists.com/organize/the-homemaker-by-dorothy-canfield/

Ponder Post: Girls

I am somewhat embarrassed to admit I read I Suck at Girls by Justin Halpern hence I did not put the full title in the post header. But I am also chagrined at how few books I have been reading in 2016 and truthfully this pads the numbers. Actually embarrassed is not quite the appropriate word to use with this book. The better word is awkward.

I Suck at Girls is a coming of age story of a young male revealing his timidity and his self-conscious, fumbling attempts at developing relationships (sexual and non-sexual) with the opposite gender, starting as early as his elementary grade school years. Told in a humorous, self-deprecating manner, I laughed, but also cringed, along with the author as he candidly reveals some of this thoughts and clumsy actions in getting closer to the opposite sex. The language is seldom squeaky clean, but the sentiments expressed and self-doubt nuggets revealed are actually quite courageous. In addition, I found the blunt no-nonsense but supportive relationship of Justin's father with his son gruffly heartwarming. I was enough engaged in the book I read it in one sitting.

The book has a positive review by Jimmy Kimmel and I generally do not like Kimmel's crude humor. But looking beyond the sporadic indelicate language, I think the candor of Justin Halpern's one-track minded mini autobiography is well worth the read. The short, easy-to-digest messages may very well give some puberty challenged males out there an empathetic insight into their struggles and comfort them that they are not alone in their self-imposed angst. The tale may give the older audience pause and a bit of nostalgic reflection as to how they personally survived those somewhat painful experiences.

Ponder Post: 3rd Degree

3rd Degree by James Patterson (and Andrew Gross) is another addition to the Women's Murder Club series. My posts reviewing his Patterson's first and second books in this series were July 13, 2015 and August 29, 2015 respectively. So far the sequence is entertaining, light reading and it does sustain an element of suspense. I like that the characters have a familiarity to them so it is like watching a favorite TV show that is on every week. This third book in the chain of James Patterson Women's Murder Club novels is copyrighted 2004, so apparently it has been around for a while. I am notoriously bad about not getting around to reading books shortly after their release. Number 15 in the series will be released in May 2016 so I have some catching up to do.

In this third book, the basic plot line is that a group of "socially conscious" radicals use violence to attempt to dispel the fiscal greed in the world. The term used in the book was to banish "economic apartheid" where the rich get richer and the poor get poorer. With a threatened deadline of another killing every three days, and with Homeland Security also involved, the pressure is on Lieutenant Lindsay Boxer of the San Francisco Police Department to find the perpetrator(s). Prominent business men are poisoned, a house explodes, a child is kidnapped, and public places are subject to terrorist type bombings. The Rincon Center is San Francisco is one such public site. I have never been there but the description of a dramatic 150-foot-tall "rain column" cascading water from the skylighted ceiling in the center of a lobby inspires me to go visit it. This murder series is set in San Francisco so I am introduced to locales near me that I have never experienced but might like to in the near future.

The chapters in 3rd Degree are very short so it quite easy to pick it up and read a bit randomly throughout the day. There are 111 chapters in 343 pages – the 111 is not a typo! There is a sprinkling of romantic interest thrown in there too, amidst all the fracases. Is this stellar literature? No. Is it an easy, enjoyable read? Definitely, yes.

Ponder Post: Three Wishes

Three Wishes by Liane Moriarty is a story about three sisters who are triplets, two identical and one fraternal. In the acknowledgement at the beginning of the book the author  states, "The book Twins: Genes, Environment and the Mystery of Identity (1997) by Lawrence Wright was very helpful to me in understanding the special relationships between triplets." My interest in this book was piqued by this statement and influenced by the fact that I truly enjoyed Liane Moriarty's novel The Husband's Secret (4/10/15 post). So when this book was on the bargain table at Costco I picked it up. That was a mistake.

The characters were zany, in an non-endearing way and their antics were unbelievable. I found the stories of their love lives and relationships boring. I am not even clear as to why the reference to three wishes is in the title. My suspicion is that this book came out in hard cover in 2004 and the paperback was just issued due to the rising appeal of Liane Moriarty. I will be more careful in the future and check the original publication date. I like the author's later works but her early ones were not so great in my opinion. I finished this book, half heartedly, rapidly skimming through it to see if there was a point to it all in the end. There was not.

My three wishes for this book are 

• I wish I had not spent my money on it
• I wish I had been more astute about checking the publication date
• I wish I had not wasted my time finishing it

Ponder Post: An Artist's Journey through Wonderland

One way to get out of a reading slump is to read short books! This ~100 page large font 6"x6"x½" book, An Artist's Journey through Wonderland, is a tiny treat. I decided to read this book after watching its author Katie Fowler give an inspiring demonstration of fearless creativity on an episode of www.The QuiltShow.com.

Katie Fowler had – notice the past tense, had  – a stunning quilt titled The Color of Infinity displayed and featured on the show. This is the 60" x 60" whole cloth quilt, an artistic creation of paint, ink and dye on white cotton with her signature black and white checks, pictured in the following photo. Other works of Katie Fowler can be seen at http://katiefowlerartquilts.com/galleries.html.

Katie Fowler started this quilt one month before her youngest child left for college and she recognized she would need to deal with that empty nest. It was a hard time for her and she noted making this quilt – and creativity in general, was about the process, not the product. During a live taping of the show she took this quilt, with all its fine stitching, and cut it into little squares to reassemble into something new. The gasps from the audience and show hosts as she slashed strips off the quilt were irrepressible. The message here was all about "letting go". She had adjusted to her empty nest and no longer felt the need to hang on to this quilt, so she used it as an example exhibiting fearlessness in creativity.

I breezed through her book in one sitting. It was written with an overarching theme and comparisons with Alice in Wonderland. Phrases like "The Cheshire Cat: Grinning at Fear" and, "Creative Chaos and a Mad Tea Party" are a bit corny but memorable. Sprinkled with simplistic illustrations, the doodles, swirls, and squiggles of the line drawings evoked a happy feeling. Admittedly, it was a bit cutesy at times, but overall the book was motivational without a lot of heavy dogma. The author counsels that creativity crushers are procrastination, perfectionism, and resistance. She is also a certified Kaizen-Muse creativity coach. I never knew such a thing existed. Aren't people innately creative to a certain degree? But, I suppose you can coax out certain tendencies and expand them.

I will skim through and browse this book again when I am in a slump – quilting, knitting, cooking, decorating, and even effective de-junking. I love the joyful painting Katie Fowler features prominently on her coaching calling card (tucked inside the book I bought from Amazon). That checkered Gumby-like figure appears to be jumping for joy and I smile just looking at those polka dot dogs. He and they are definitely hanging out in the creative zone! Don't we all feel great when we can lose ourselves in some creative endeavor and the time just whizzes by? And when finished, isn't it satisfying to stand back, arms outspread, and declare, "TA-DA"? A valuable phrase I took away from the reading experience and want to remember is...

No To-Do lists, only TA-DA lists!

Dan and Vivian's Visit

Dan and Vivian were flying up to Livermore for a daddy/daughter weekend away, April 1-3. Vivian's mom Carrie stayed home. Pregnant with Vivian's little sister-to-be and due in May, her doctor advised against traveling.

Dan and Vivian's flight got in to Oakland airport shortly after 7:00pm on Friday, April 1st. Frank and I went in to the terminal to meet them rather than doing the standard drive-by pick up approach, where the arriving travelers drag their luggage out to the curb area outside the baggage claim, toss their bags into the trunk, and then jump into the car. We figured Dan would have his hands full with a two-year old and bags and we wanted to be in a parking lot while getting Vivian securely situated in her carseat. Frank and I stationed ourselves at the base of the escalator just beyond the blue "sterile area" sign demarcating the border established by security. When we spotted them at the top of the escalator we started waving frantically. I dropped to my knees and held my arms wide for Vivian. She held her daddy's hand coming down the escalator. At the bottom, she let go and ran full tilt across the space yelling "Grandma" and flung herself into my outstretched arms. My heart melted. This was going to be a great weekend!

By the time we got home Friday evening, it was just about Vivian's bedtime. We ate a quick dinner. I had made Sloppy Joe and cornbread earlier in the day that just needed to be warmed up. I'd set up the Pack 'N Play in my sewing room and sewn a sheet for the mattress earlier in the week, so it was all ready for bed and nap times. Vivian dropped off to sleep quickly.

We planned to have a lazy morning Saturday, April 2nd and go to an early matinee of the movie Zootopia. It was a beautiful day and on the short walk over to the theatre from the parking garage, we paused to pet and admire a statue of a dog and a boy with an ice cream cone.

The bronze plaque at its base showed the title to be Sunday with Jessie. Our dog when Dan, Robin, and Alex were growing up was also named Jessie, so that sparked some reminiscing. The sculpture was just installed last fall so it was new to Frank and me as well. I love that Livermore has these little personality touches nestled throughout the town. It makes me glad we live here.

Once inside the lobby of the movie theatre we stocked up on lots of popcorn. We learned that our local theatre was being refurbished with all reclining lounge chair seats. What a treat! Vivian was fully engaged throughout the entire movie even though we confused our movie times and got there 30 minutes too early. I was concerned that she might get antsy and we'd need to leave before the movie ended. I am glad we got to stay through the whole thing because the movie was really fun and I actually cared about the outcome.

The animation, especially the background scenery, was truly exceedingly creative. The characters were expressive, believable, multi-dimensional, and likable (or at least explicably unlikeable).  The plot and theme had a good message without being preachy. There was action and suspense. It was far better than some of those films that are nominated for academy awards! The sloth sequence at the DMV was positively hilarious.

We admired the movie poster on our way back to the car, although it looks like Vivian found Grandpa more interesting.

One of the exit doors to a theatre in the process of refurbishment was open. We got to sneak a peek at what was involved in upgrading the seating. It had been cushy and relaxing to watch a movie the way we did so I am pleasantly surprised about the renovations in progress.

After the movie, when we got home, it was nap time for Vivian and she took a nice, undisturbed one. Vivian's turns two on April 6, next Wednesday so after her nap we had some birthday presents for her to open. One of them was a set of farm animal wooden beads that teaches stringing skills. She lay companionably close to her daddy as he took the pieces out of the packaging for her.

I never thought about it before, but how many times in your life have you needed bead-stringing skills? Sewing on a button or feeding a curtain casing onto a rod needs that skill but I could not off-hand  think of much more than that. I suppose I use it in my quilting to thread a needle but, with my eyes the age that they are, I use a helper. The thread goes in a slot, the needle goes eye side down in a hole, I press the lever, and voila, a threaded needle.

In the greater scheme of things, stringing skill is a means toward developing eye-hand coordination. (In today's society, isn't that also said of video games...?) Even if you never passed that shoelace though the shaped wooden "beads", I thought the painted animals were quite striking and appealing and they were in keeping with some farm themed gifts we had given her at this past Christmas. Vivian's use of the toy involved lining up the animals neatly on her daddy's chest, never mind that string thing.

Another birthday gift was a pair of sandals that light up upon impact. The three hearts down the center of the front vertical strap at the instep will flicker on and off in sequence at the "patter of little feet". Vivian allowed her daddy to help her put them on. I noticed this trip that, more often than not, she declared "I do it!".

The next day, Sunday April 3rd, we set off to do bowling with Alex. Vivian's typical "I do it" mantra kicked in at the bowling alley as she worked hard at putting on her own bowling shoes. Luckily the smallest size the alley had, size 7, was "just right" as Goldilocks might say.

Dan and Vivian stood side by side to show off their daddy and daughter matching shoes.

Alex and Frank had arrived before Dan, Vivian, and me so they could get in a couple extra games. It is a hoot how Vivian leans casually against Dan's leg to watch Uncle Alex in action bowling as she waits her turn. I love her pose –  right elbow on Daddy's knee, left hand as if her thumb is hooked in her rear jean pocket. Watch out for her teen years; they will be here before you know it.

Earl Anthony's Dublin Bowl has dinosaur ramps for the very young bowlers so we borrowed one for Vivian. She pushed her ball off all twenty times! Well, almost all twenty.

Toward the end, Vivian piled her jacket on the top and pushed it instead. The jacket may be a lot lighter and easier to lift but it does not knock down nearly as many pins as a bowling ball.

Our jaws dropped when it was Alex's turn and Vivian was in the rotation. He approached his lane, went over and got the dinosaur ramp, and set it in place where he was to bowl. He then placed his ball on the top of the ramp, and pushed. We had never done this with him and were amazed that he took the initiative to try this for himself. He did this entire sequence unassisted on his turn all ten frames that Vivian was bowling with us.

After finishing our game, we ordered pizza from the snack bar. Vivian opened another present we had brought along. It was a stacking castle toy and when she ripped off the wrapping paper she announced "castle". I was impressed with her vocabulary at age two.

I'd brought along mini-cupcakes and birthday candles and matches. We sang Happy Birthday to her, then she and Alex got to blow out a candle inserted in a cupcake. Vivian enjoyed her cupcake. It was chocolate, a favorite of hers, just like her mama. All right, Grandma does spoil her. She had two cupcakes. But they were small. The photo is a child-in-lap cell phone selfie taken by Grandma. The lucky thing is, unlike Vivian's face, my cell phone escaped being coated with blue icing.

Here is the motley crew after the festivities, pre-icing cleansing.

Here is a closeup of Vivian and Uncle Alex after icing removal –  sort of.

Vivian is sporting her pink FAA shirt, a gift from Aunt Robin during her visit to OKC the week before.

I would text Carrie periodically to let her know what we were up to so she would not feel left out. On our way to bowling I had texted her a photo of a happy Vivian in the car seat. Ever the watchful mom, from Southern California, ~390 miles away, Carrie texted back that the seat belt clip was too low for ultimate safety. It needed to be higher on the chest, at armpit level.

On the way back from bowling we complied. Vivian cooperated and I texted Carrie proof.

As Dan was packing and we were doing the final preparations before departing for the airport we offered Vivian the opportunity to watch Frozen. She agreed immediately and was rapt watching it.

I set her up with Goldfish crackers. Carrie told me she had never had them but she seemed to enjoy them.

Before leaving for the airport we tried to use up a lot of Vivian's energy pre-plane ride. Grandpa did one last episode of monkeys jumping on the bed - one of Vivian's favorite activities.

It was a great weekend and we loved having Dan and Vivian here. We did miss Carrie but hope she got some rest at home with it being less action packed since her husband and daughter were away. At least we only have to wait a month or so to see Vivian again, next time at her own home. We plan to fly down in May when her baby sister arrives.

Hoppy Easter

Having just returned the previous weekend from a busy week in Oklahoma, our goal was to make Easter last Sunday, March 27th,  a simple affair. We did not plan for any guests and just spent the day with Alex, bowling as usual for a Sunday, and then relaxing in Livermore in our home decorated in a bunny theme for the holiday and for Alex's pleasure. This jumbo sized bunny greets us upon entry into the living room. He has been with us for thirteen years. He rode home in my suitcase in 2003, coincidentally also from Oklahoma. Robin had just moved out there to start her post-college job with the FAA and she and I ate at a Cracker Barrel restaurant. This fellow is from the gift shop at that restaurant chain.

The living room hearth has its display of bunnies and carrots and painted wooden eggs. The wooden bunny family on the far right are carved and tole painted stair balusters. I remember buying them when the company store at Lawrence  Livermore Lab closed.

The clerks were pleased that the bunny family was going to a good home. Papa, Mama, and Baby Bunny had served as counter decorations for many years. They come out every year at our house.

Bunnies do have a reputation of reproducing rapidly. The population explosion spills over into a gathering on the piano in the family room.

Alex sits here amongst the rabbit population and does a puzzle while waiting for dinner.

My goal after being on travel was convenience. We ate ham steak and pierogies - yes pre-vacuum packed and pre-frozen food, I confess. Alex chowed down. He loved both. Salt and butter – what more could you want? Oh, yes, Chocolate!

The table was set with three rabbit messengers, courtesy of a bulk purchase Costco three-pack. They took care of the chocolate part with the Hershey's kisses in the leaf, the flower, or the basket each carried.

The bunnies stayed up through this past weekend, April 1-3. No, it was not an April Fool's prank. Dan was bringing Vivian up from SoCal and we thought she might enjoy them. She exclaimed "My bunny rabbit" and took this simple one home with her.

It was just the right size for that chubby toddler hand of hers.

We indeed did have a Happy, Hoppy Easter and we stretched it to last.

Ponder Post: See Me

See me. See me flounder. My reading pace has not been very impressive so far this year. See Me by Nicholas Sparks is only the second book I have completed in 2016 but I am hoping it has rescued me from my reading malaise. I started and stopped reading Wishful Thinking by Kamy Wicoff. My determination to stick it out sidetracked me from pursuing other books until I just gave up on it as too mundane. I could not get into Three Wishes by Liane Moriarty and I started the magic strings of Frankie Presto by Mitch Albom and abandoned it, also. These last two are by authors I generally like so I will give these books a second chance. It must be my mood that is making me so lackadaisical. By this time in 2015 I had read nine books.

I carried See Me out and back to Oklahoma with me and never cracked the cover. But I did read it within one day once home. I have read all of Nicholas Sparks' books and I would rank this one in the bottom third for the first half that was romantic, yes, but slow moving. I would rank it among his top third for the second half where the pace picked up and there was more action and intrigue. The title is still somewhat of a mystery to me and the yellow roses on the cover design did not relate back to the story in my opinion.

This book seemed to deviate from Sparks' normal style. It almost had a thriller tone to it. The male main character presents an interesting perspective and insight into growing up with ADHD and describes ways he copes with it as an adult. Generally ADHD is discussed mainly in the context of children so I found the adult aspect thought-provoking. In Sparks' novels there is often a heart-wrenching emotional twist near the end. I rarely anticipate the exact moment it will occur and seldom guess what it will be so, ironic as it may sound, I have come to expect, and even eagerly anticipate, this element of surprise. There was no such thing in this story. I had to wait until after the tale concluded and I was reading the acknowledgements at the end. There Nicholas Sparks first thanked Cathy, "who remains a wonderful friend" and "our children".

Friend? Don't you mean wife? I did a Wikipedia search and learned he and his wife had amicably divorced in 2015 after twenty-five years of marriage. I was bummed and disillusioned. How can someone who consistently writes such romantic books, focusing on tender love relations between couples, not be able to sustain those sentiments and practices in his own marriage? I am not one to follow the private lives of celebrities or care about the contents of magazines such as People, and it is none of my business, but I could not help being a bit saddened to learn this information. Setting that thought aside, I pondered what next I should read.

I thought I might try again to select my next book from the list of thirteen books about to be made into movies this year. From our local library I requested Let It Snow, The 5th Wave, The Zookeeper's Wife, and East of Eden. As luck would have it, they became available all at once. I checked each out. Each became due. I renewed each once and some of them twice. Still, I was never inspired enough to read them. I will try again, or maybe instead I should select from the books I own in my "to Read" pile that is collecting dust. Hmmm. Am I fooling myself? It is April 1st after all.